This blog shares 3 things to know before starting couples counseling. You and your partner may be feeling like counseling is your last hope. There have been significant struggles in your relationship, and it’s time to seek out support. Or, you simply want to address some things coming up lately, and don’t feel that your relationship is in jeopardy of ending.
You may feel like seeking out marriage counseling is a bad thing, or says something negative about your relationship. Actually, starting couples therapy shows a lot of devotion towards each other, to both address any ongoing issues! Counseling can really help you and your partner navigate through tough situations.
Before getting started, it’s important to know these 3 things. First, all partners need to agree to therapy. Surprising your partner with a session will not start things on the right foot. Next, it is a process that cannot be rushed. Healing takes time! Finally, the therapist will not take sides.
3 Things to Know Before Starting Couples Counseling – 1) All partners need to agree to therapy
One thing that we encounter is an individual seeking to begin marriage counseling, however the other partner is not aware that they are inquiring around, or they have already shared not being open to it. In this case, it’s highly unlikely that a therapist will still move forward with scheduling an appointment.
In addition, therapists or their intake coordinators cannot call the other partner to introduce this idea to them. This includes trying to convince the other partner into trying a session out, or sharing any information unsolicited. Not only is this unethical, but it can also be harmful in a number of ways.
It is highly recommended to sit down and discuss this idea with your partner, to ensure you are on the same page. You may want to discuss logistics of the therapy, such as location, pricing, and availability. Also, you can establish any goals for therapy, or topics you want to address in session together.
Marriage therapy near Simi Valley, Ca will provide you and your partner with equal support and understanding. Make sure to read our blog on 4 Reasons to Start Couples Therapy!
2) It is a process that cannot be rushed
It’s important to go into this process open-minded, and ready to address any current or past issues. This includes: communication issues, infidelity, past relationship issues, current stressors, and more. You may end up exploring much more than your initial reason for starting counseling.
Because your therapist is dedicated to gathering information, understanding who you are as people, and being sure to focus on outstanding issues at the moment, this process cannot be rushed! It will take time to get to know you and your background.
If you go into this process expecting to have an answer to whether or not you should stay together, you may want to reconsider. While your therapist can help mediate conversations around this, you may find that reaching a definitive answer isn’t as simple.
3) The therapist will not take sides
One other important thing to know is that your therapist will not take sides. For example, you’re going into counseling because your partner did something that was harmful or detrimental to your relationship. Therefore, you want the focus to be fully on them and this incident.
However, your therapist will want to address this with both of you. It will involve asking you both how the incident made you feel, steps you both can take to address it, and how you can work together to figure out your relationship’s next steps.
If you are feeling hurt, unheard, or confused with your relationship, individual therapy is the best option for you. You will benefit greatly from having your own space, and may be able to include your partner down the road. In this case, your therapist can address the issue in a different way with you.
You may have many more questions in regards to starting marriage counseling or couples therapy. Therefore, feel free to give us a call for a free consultation today!
In-person therapy in Simi Valley is ideal for those seeking a separate, safe space from their home. Check out our blog on Online Therapy or In Office Therapy to understand what format is best for you. Another great blog to read is ours on if you need Therapy or Medication to address your issues.
By seeking out support, you can begin your journey to feeling relief. You don’t have to go through finding the right level of support alone, either.
Consider calling our therapy group at (805) 774-1506 for a free consultation on how you or a loved one can get started today!
Seek out a validating, safe environment with us today. We will help you get to where you want to be. Our therapists provide trauma therapy, teen therapy, individual adult therapy, LGBTQIA+ therapy, anxiety therapy, depression therapy, family therapy, and more in-office in Simi Valley, CA.