Teen Therapy or Family Therapy?

This blog answers your question – teen therapy or family therapy? You’re a parent wanting to understand what type of therapy will be most beneficial. Lately, there have been some issues within the family dynamic. This could look like your teen struggling, a lack of communication or boundaries, or and more. 

 

You want to speak with a therapist about how to move forward with your teen. This could look like establishing house rules, improving your relationship together, and more. There may be signs that your teen is struggling with depression, anxiety, social skills, or more. As a parent, you want to learn how to best support them and improve your relationship.

 

At New Leaf, we typically recommend providing everyone with individual support to begin. This allows for focused support on each of you, to gather background information and build rapport together. If there is constant family conflict, it helps to separate everyone for them to have their own space. Depending on the unique issues you’re looking to address, we can help understand the best route for your family.

 

Teen Therapy or Family Therapy? Common issues addressed

Common issues that parents want to address with a therapist include:

 

• Improving the relationship / connection with their teen

 

• Finding ways to reduce or de-escalate arguments or conflict

 

• Understanding and accepting your teen, such as if they identify as LGBTQIA+

 

• Providing support for their depression, anxiety, trauma, and more

 

• Receiving support as a parent for parenting challenges

 

It could be that you and your teen are really butting heads lately. You feel that your teen is acting disrespectfully, shutting you out, or more. Maybe they aren’t keeping up with chores you ask them to do, and tend to be dismissive of your attempts to connect with them.

 

At this developmental stage in their life, your teen is likely seeking some independence. As they figure out who they are or what they want to be, they’re going through a lot of emotional, mental and physical changes. Common teen issues, such as identity, friendships, relationships, and school can pile up and become overwhelming.

 

With that, you may notice that your teen is increasingly irritable, wants to be left alone, or be out of the house more often. This can make it difficult for you to understand what they’re needing, and how you two can meet in the middle. 

 

What’s the most effective way to address these issues together?

 

With therapy, it’s important that everyone feels heard and understood. With that, it’s also important that everyone is receptive or open-minded to feedback. It’s likely that the therapist will recommend teen therapy to start. They will meet with you for the first session, and sporadically moving forward. This helps include you in the therapeutic process, while focusing on your teen’s current issues.

 

Your teen therapist will want to talk with you about your overall goal for the family. With that, they will also want to understand how you will contribute to those goals. This could look like improving communication, setting boundaries, positively reinforcing your teen, and more. 

 

You can expect their therapist to provide you with updates on their progress, check-in about what you’re noticing at home, and more. Teen therapy in Simi Valley, CA works to involve family members in a teen’s therapy journey. Make sure to read our blog on 3 Benefits of Teen Therapy!

 

Teen Therapy or Family Therapy? Talk to them about their comfort level for therapy

It’s understandable that teens may not be open to starting therapy. The idea of talking to a complete stranger, coordinated by their parent, may feel unsettling. There are concerns that you and the therapist are “teaming up” against them, or that their own feelings or needs won’t be considered. In general, they may struggle with vulnerability or expressing themselves.

 

Because of this, they may be even more hesitant to start therapy with their parents. It can produce a worry that maybe they won’t get a say in session, and have little control over the experience. Talking to your teen about their comfort level for therapy can empower them in this decision.

 

Teen therapy can provide a level of security and comfort for them. While the therapist wants to collaborate with family members, the main focus is on your teen. It’s important to the therapist that your teen feels safe opening up about difficult details or feelings. With that level of trust established, they can be more receptive to treatment and look forward to returning.

 

What if my teen wants me, as a parent, to attend every session with them?

 

This can be appropriate for the first few sessions. It could be that you and your teen have a close relationship, where they are very open with you about their life. They have anxiety around the fact of meeting with a stranger, and may look to you for support in this. Your teen may also want you to explain certain things to the therapist on their behalf.

 

However, teen therapy focuses on strengthening their coping skills, self-awareness, and functioning outside of session. It may be recommended for only the teen to come into sessions, to help empower them and get them out of their comfort zone. With time, you can still attend sporadic family sessions, and have one-on-ones with the therapist. These help clarify where your teen is at with their progress, and check in with you as a parent.

 

What if my teen doesn’t want me to be a part of their therapy sessions at all?

 

Your teen may express concerns that they don’t want the therapist to repeat what they share with you. They are hesitant to open up about some things, for example, in fear that they may get in trouble. However, the therapist will do their best to establish trust and rapport with them from the start. 

 

They can expect for the sessions to remain confidential in most cases. There are legal obligations to break confidentiality, such as if your teen has plans to harm themselves or others. Alongside this, therapists are mandated reporters, and required by law to report suspected abuse. 

 

Aside from that, you can expect to be a part of their therapy sessions in other ways. It’s important to reiterate that the therapist will not share any details about what’s been discussed in session. Most everything remains confidential unless there is concern for their well-being. You can expect the therapist to discuss what they will and will not share.

 

How do I know if a therapist is a good fit for my teen?

 

It really takes trial and error. We recommend attending at least 4 sessions with the therapist to get a feel for their style. The first few sessions are dedicated to psychoeducation and building rapport. Your teen will be able to judge their comfort level, if they feel understood by the therapist, and more. 

 

If your teen shares feeling like the sessions aren’t productive, check in with their therapist. Express any concerns and give them feedback to see if you can move forward. This can help improve the direction of sessions. 

 

Family counseling in Simi Valley, CA aims to work with 3 family members at a time, to ensure everyone receives focused support. 

 

Teen Therapy or Family Therapy? Where to start

Research some local marriage and family therapists in your area. You’ll want to consider a few factors, such as:

 

• Location

 

• In-person or virtual therapy

 

• Cost of services 

 

• How insurance is or is not used 

 

• Therapist specialties 

 

• Your/your teen’s availability (aim to have varying times to dedicate to therapy)

 

Hold consultations with several therapists to see who would be the best fit. As mentioned, it can take a few sessions to fully understand if they are. Therapists seek out, and benefit from, your direct feedback. If you ever have any questions or concerns during the process, please don’t hesitate to connect with them. 

 

Figuring out which type of therapy to move forward with can be tricky. Should we all do individual therapy, then come together for family counseling? Or would only select members benefit from therapy? Call us today for a free consultation on how you can proceed.

 

In-person therapy in Simi Valley is ideal for those seeking a separate, safe space from their home. Check out our blog on Online Therapy or In Office Therapy to understand what format is best for you. Another great blog to read is ours on if you need Therapy or Medication to address your issues.

 

By seeking out support, you can begin your journey to feeling relief. You don’t have to go through finding the right level of support alone, either. By clicking here, you’ll read our blog on Information About Simi Valley Therapists.

 

Consider calling our therapy group at (805) 774-1506 for a free consultation on how you or a loved one can get started today!

Seek out a validating, safe environment with us today. We will help you get to where you want to be. Our therapists provide trauma therapy, teen therapy, individual adult therapy, LGBTQIA+ therapy, anxiety therapy, depression therapy, family therapy, and more in-office in Simi Valley, CA.