This short blog answers the question: can marriage counseling help? You and your spouse may be at a crossroads. It could be that one, or both of you, feel that separation or divorce is the only option. However, you’re open to seeing what marriage therapy can do to help.
It’s important to go into marriage counseling with an open mind. The purpose of this is to have the therapist encourage and challenge you both to identify issues and resolutions. Marriage counselors will not be able to say whether you should or should not stay together.
Marriage counseling provides clarity into issues, promotes self-accountability, and preparedness for what next steps may occur. Your therapist will provide assignments for you to both work on regularly, as well as coping strategies. You may find that you’ll learn a lot about yourself as an individual during this process too.
Can Marriage Counseling Help?: Identifying goals for therapy
You and your spouse may be coming into marriage counseling with similar, or vastly different goals. Whatever combination it is, we have worked with it before and are prepared to help. Both partners may want to work to save the marriage, while one may be feeling checked out and ready to leave the relationship.
Identifying goals for therapy sets realistic expectations for the process. It is a priority to have conversations around what led you both here, and your mental health. Maybe something specific occurred, such as infidelity, and we need to talk through that and process it before establishing a goal.
You may have goals to improve communication, improve intimacy, heal from relationship trauma, discuss separation, or more. Therefore, your therapist can help you find a middle ground. You may not know exactly what you want going into this process; therefore we can help establish goals together.
Couples therapy in Simi Valley helps you establish achievable goals in your relationship. Make sure to read our blog on 4 Reasons to Start Couples Therapy.
Can Marriage Counseling Help?: Having difficult conversations guided by a marriage counselor
It could be that you’ve tried to talk about these issues with each other, but it results in feeling upset or shutting down. You may not be able to come to agreements about how to resolve an issue, or unsure of how to get there. Regardless, addressing it just between you two feels unproductive.
Therefore you’re seeking out a marriage counselor to mediate conversations between you two. In the room, you both will take turns speaking about what is affecting you and your marriage. Your therapist will provide questions to better understand your reasoning, feelings, and behaviors.
Having a designated space for talking about sensitive topics can be comforting. You’ll do the work outside with each other, and come back to really discuss progress in session. Being able to leave the stress of navigating this process away from your home, can ease tensions.
Marriage counseling near Simi Valley provides a space for productive conversations to occur. Make sure to read our blog on How to Find a Marriage Therapist.
Can Marriage Counseling Help?: Understanding the role you both play
A variety of reasons may bring you to marriage counseling. Depending on your unique situation, you may feel that you both contribute to ongoing issues, or feel that each other are the reason for the issues. As stated, it’s important to go into marriage counseling open-minded.
Your marriage counselor will not take sides on certain issues or make one partner feel singled out. Their goal is to help you both feel supported, understood, and heard. They will work to guide you towards self-reflection and finding ways to compromise with one another.
It will be crucial for you both to take this process seriously, and implement assigned tasks or strategies. This includes learning each other’s love languages, understanding each other’s triggers, and engaging in healthy coping mechanisms in times of stress.
So, can marriage counseling help? Yes, it can help for a number of reasons. Depending on the reason for starting therapy, your therapist will help establish clear end-goals for this process. If you are interested in giving it a shot, don’t hesitate to reach out to New Leaf Marriage & Family Therapy today.
In-person therapy in Simi Valley is ideal for those seeking a separate, safe space from their home. Check out our blog on Online Therapy or In Office Therapy to understand what format is best for you. Another great blog to read is ours on if you need Therapy or Medication to address your issues.
By seeking out support, you can begin your journey to feeling relief. You don’t have to go through finding the right level of support alone, either.
Consider calling our therapy group at (805) 774-1506 for a free consultation on how you or a loved one can get started today!
Seek out a validating, safe environment with us today. We will help you get to where you want to be. Our therapists provide trauma therapy, teen therapy, individual adult therapy, LGBTQIA+ therapy, anxiety therapy, depression therapy, family therapy, and more in-office in Simi Valley, CA.